The Ballad of the Booming Breeze
Chorus:
Heave away, me hearty crew,
The wind abaft is strong and true!
If the sails are hanging slack,
Stand behind and don't look back!
Yo-ho-ho, let thunder start—
Mind the sailor with the mighty... fart!
We shipped at dawn from harbor fair,
With salted beef and briny air.
The captain cried, "Make haste, my lads!"
Then someone loosed a blast so bad.
Chorus:
Heave away, me hearty crew,
The wind abaft is strong and true!
If the sails are hanging slack,
Stand behind and don't look back!
Yo-ho-ho, let thunder start—
Mind the sailor with the mighty... fart!
The bosun swore, "What devil's that?
A cannon shot from Neptune's cat?"
The cook just grinned and tipped his hat:
"'Twas beans," he said. "Imagine that."
Chorus
The gulls took flight, the sharks dove deep,
The captain woke from needed sleep.
The compass spun, the timbers creaked,
The cabin door sprang open, squeaked!
Chorus
We crossed the seas through fog and foam,
Till every port felt just like home.
But every tavern knew our crew
By echoes only sailors knew.
Final Chorus:
Heave away, me hearty crew,
The wind abaft is strong and true!
Though storms may rage and waves may part,
Nothing beats a sailor's fart!
Yo-ho-ho, sing loud and free—
The gassiest crew upon the sea!
